Answers
Building Relationship Capital
Advisor:
Quynh Nguyen Tuan
Member of Board of Management
PNJ
Timing:
The discussion is open from 14-05-2012 to 02-07-2012
The advisor answered on 26-06-2012
What are most important factors to be a good communicator?
Hi Mr. Quynh,
In my point of view, building up a new relationship requires communication. Or I can say Communication is the key to create a new relationship. Some people believe that broad Knowledge is the best way to be a good communicator. How do you think about this opinion? Could you please share with us your own opinion: what makes a person a good/great communicator!
Thank you very much!
Pages
- Quynh Nguyen Tuan1341471077
Chào Rosie,
Kiến thức rộng không phải yếu tố quyết định. Yếu tố quyết định bạn có phải người giao tiếp giỏi nằm ở thái độ sống, cách cư xử, sự cởi mở, vui vẻ. Những điều này sẽ quyết định xem người ta có quý mến bạn hay không. Rồi sau đó mới tới kiến thức và kinh nghiệm sống phù hợp với mối quan hệ.
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It's like "the magician and the white rabbit coming out of the hat".
The purpose of Good communication from a good communicator is to make you do something that he wants you to do.
It takes ACTIVE LISTENING which is not easy. You need to listen to exactly 3 things:
a- What is really MOTIVATING the person or the group to do something -an emotion usually like pride, greed, love, self accomplishment, learning...- the famous DBM= Dominant Buying Motive
b- What is really his FUNCTIONING style, people act more on words, writing, sound, music, movement, video...
c- What is the NEXT ACTION that the person is ready to do
Then comes the ACTIVE communication. Nothing to do with knowledge or charisma really otherwise there would be so few good communicators!
You will need to Communicate on 3 levels to get the person to do soemething:
1- say the RIGHT THING to get a- MOTIVATE the person to act
2- say in the RIGHT WAY to get that person FUNCTIONING easily -I had a boss that could not listen and decide in meetings whatever you told him, he was a "READER" he needed to read something/a report/email then he was in a "decision status".
3- say the RIGHT AMOUNT of information, otherwise you lose your listener.NB. Of course, images and story telling are the basics to get your message through and remembered. Good communication is the magician with the white rabbit, you remember him always.
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There are many factors that make a good communicator. But the most important factor is the heart. You must listen by your heart and also speak by your heart. When doing this, you will get the empathy from other hearts. Then you will be a great communicator.
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3 điều quan trọng nhất của giao tiếp
01- hãy lắng nghe tích cực thật nhiều
02- cố gắng chia sẻ cảm xúc với người nói
03- Luôn luôn cố gắng hiểu bối cảnh của người nói - context
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Relationships are built based on trust so trust is the key in any relationships. However, trust is something that is hard to gain but easy to lose...
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Great question Rosie, I'm encourage you want to become a better communicator. I'm also on the same journey :)
You are absolutely right. Communication is the oxygen of relationships. Communication is basically the exchange of thoughts and feelings. The deeper the thoughts and feelings we can exchange with another, the stronger and more trusting the relationship becomes. Relationships don't die suddenly, they die from neglect, when we stop communicating.
I believe the most important factor to be a good communicator is the WHY of communication - caring for others. John Maxwell's quote sums is up beautifully: "People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care."
When we have the right WHY, it becomes enjoyable for us to really try to understand others, even the most difficult people. When we communicate to care for others, we are able to put ourselves in others' shoes. When we communicate to care for others, we can identify the best HOW to communicate.
The technical part of communication (eg. body language, voice, word, questioning, listening etc) can be learned by anyone with practice. But even when someone has learned all the right techniques but have the wrong WHY, it's not going to work.
Start with belief that we communicate to care for others and you will find communication more enjoyable, satisfying and be on your way to be a great communicator :)
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