It would be depended on the characterization of each individual. People says that there are three kinds of person who (i) live for himself/herself, (ii) live for his/her family (i.e. parents, brothers, etc) and (iii) live for his/her own family (i.e. wife, children). "What do you really work for? Money to live"! So why you bring to your family the problems/issues from your work and mad at your beloved family members? We all work for getting money which bring a good life for our family. Please bring happniess to your house after your work. The question raised looks like a trick. When you feel happy with your family, we actually can work well or when you can share all concerns/issues from your work with your family, it is "family support the work". The consequence from that is you perform your work well, you will be paid better, it is "work support the family". Of course, there will be a lot of view from others. My view is these two phrases need to go together. Moreover, I'm more on the side "family support work" as a successful person usually takes a best opportunity (i.e. change the job). There is no reverse way as I really don't know a successful person usually divorce. Best

Hi Paul,

This question is somehow similar to the aged old philosophy dilemma on the egg & the chicken. It would be one-sided if concluding either work or family in the role of supporting. It's also confusing when coming to a more particular understanding of "support" in reality: which kind of action, behavior, attitude, etc. would be called "support" and in contrast, which would not be?

Believing in each of the two extremes could be a philosophical trap, for there’s nothing stable in life. Life is change & change is life! Thus, avoid being clung to either work or life could be the best strategy. One should seek ways to balance between these two factors and be flexible enough to make work or life a great factor of support in each period of his/her life time.

Thank you for raising this question so that we can share our view point. Hope to get more sharing from you and Anphabe members!

I think it is not be "OR" but should be "AND": work to support the family AND family should also support the work. Making this choice is tough but I don't believe there is any other way around. Some women may say: "I'm sacrifice my work to stay at home, keeping the family happy"; some men may say "I have to work so hard in order to make my family happy". This is NOT true. When you have the attitude of "have to" or " scarifying", you are not happy. And when you are NOT happy, can you give happiness to anyone else? NO.

Some of my own tip to attain both family and work support are:
- My choice of career should not be my own decision. I try best to get my husband involve, consult and also make decision with me. With this as a family choice, I can have much better support from him when my work get tough.
- I communicate clearly both to the team and family member about my priority to adjust well there expectation about me: When kid is sick, I need to spend more time with them and work from home. But when work is ram up, I need to stay late at work. I encourage my team and my husband to do the same
- Money is always important to support the family. But when you have choice of not to worry everyday about how to feed your kid and your family, choose the job that is most meaningful to you, allowing you to give your best and add best value, choose it and money will follow.

If anyone has other ways, please share.

Thanks

To me family is always the center, not only the work but everything we do is all for our family.
My perspective about family that family is the center of the circle, and circle of the circle are the points of success in our career.
We are on the radius but never move straight but as a spiral, whose life we grew up and develop our career, originally located very close to our family,since born, go to school, then start up career, more and more we'll away from the center.
There are only 2 ways can help balance
1. Make the bigger center in the circle.
2. Moving slower